The New One

March 15, 2020
Self-deprecating reflections on the peaks and valleys of modern fatherhood. Comedian Birbiglia and his wife, Stein, parlay their individual creative talents into a funny and wise memoir on parenting. Fusing good humor and raw honesty with selections from Stein's evocative poetry, Birbiglia narrates his journey into parenting using material previously adapted for the Broadway stage. From the outset, the author admits to having "a low tolerance for children because I've lost a lot of great friends to kids." He was up front about that fact since he and wife Stein got married in 2008, but when she casually mentioned that having children would "be different" for them, Birbiglia knew he was in store for some major changes. Though he outlines seven reasons for his reluctance about becoming a father--e.g., overpopulation, cancer history, a lack of great people in the world ("The men we used to think were great were priests, politicians, and gymnastics doctors. It hasn't ended well for great")--Birbiglia eventually warmed to the idea. The couple birthed their daughter, Oona, despite the author's varicocele condition, demanding touring schedules, and Stein's brutally difficult pregnancy. The author ably narrates these hurdles with the serious concern of a devoted husband and the comic timing of a seasoned entertainer. Throughout the book, Stein seamlessly interweaves her artistic verses, tempering all the facetiousness beautifully. Never clinical or overly extreme, Birbiglia's lighthearted, refreshingly droll approach to starting a family will appeal most to readers who can identify with both his reluctance to couple up and his acceptance and embracement of parenting. There are also shared moments of introspection and maturity, not to mention useful wisdom. As Oona moved into toddlerhood, Birbiglia began to accept himself as the "decent dad" he never thought he could become. Hilarious, relatable, cringeworthy, and effortlessly entertaining, particularly for new parents or those in contemplation.

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March 30, 2020
Comedian Birbiglia (Sleepwalk with Me) reflects on fatherhood in this fast-paced memoir, which also features his wife Stein’s brief, intimate poems. In 2016, 40-year-old Birbiglia was happily married and happily childless: “I’ve lost a lot of great friends to kids,” he notes. Then, Stein (Little Astronaut) tells him that she wanted to abandon their vow of childlessness; desperate to change her mind, he cites his dangerous sleepwalking disorder, high cholesterol, and a teenage bout with cancer as proof he’s “a walking pre-existing condition,” but his wife won him over. Stein develops complications during her pregnancy (she writes of her unborn daughter, “my body may fail you,/ (sorry)”), while the expectant father engages in “sympathy eating.” (“I’m so sorry you’re having cramps—are you gonna finish those fries?” writes Birbiglia). In the months after daughter Oona’s birth, Birbiglia grows fearful that he may never connect with his “little monkey,” yet soon enough he wins small victories, like receiving “record-high approval ratings” from Oona for his rendition of “Ave Maria.” The turning point comes when he plays hide and seek with her in a furniture showroom, and she begins “laughing so hard that I start laughing in a new way... We’re laughing as one.” Birbiglia’s witty take on new parenthood will resonate especially with those who’ve been there.

April 15, 2020
Before they got married, comedian Birbiglia (Sleepwalk with Me and Other Painfully True Stories, 2010) and poet Stein didn't think they wanted kids. Somewhere along the line, though, feelings changed and they found themselves parents to baby Oona. Spurred by the "jealousy" prompt for a storytelling event, the couple shared their private writing about parenthood with one another, beginning the collaboration that evolved into a Broadway play, then a Netflix special, and now this book. While there are plenty of laughs here, the subtitle isn't hyperbole: Birbiglia, whose essay-chapters make up the bulk of the book, gets into some deep and dark stuff as he adjusts to parenthood, often feeling like a third wheel: "It's almost like I didn't know what nothing meant until I became a dad and then I realized, Oh, that's what nothing is." Sweet poems from Stein add levity and joy, too. Sex, sympathy weight, and Birbiglia's sleep disorder are all fair game in this hilariously, sometimes shockingly, and always refreshingly honest look at having a kid and becoming new one's self.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2020, American Library Association.)