I Am Yours

April 22, 2019
Public speaker Zaman debuts with the powerful account of how she grew from being a voiceless girl to a woman with a confident “roar.” Born in 1984 in Bangladesh to loving but mismatched parents (their marriage was arranged), Zaman became a rebellious, anorexic teen; attended Skidmore College; and, after graduation, moved to Manhattan to work as an actress. There she encountered an artistically invigorating but harsh world in which she was date-raped and later married an emotionally abusive man. Zaman can be very perceptive (“Sometimes death is the force that stuns us alive”); however, readers may recognize the red flags that she missed until too late—such as her husband demanding she change her dress and blot her makeup before going out. Zaman writes of her refusal to let abusive relationships alter her, choosing instead to listen to her inner voice that tells her, “All I need, I have.” She eventually divorces her husband and finds her inner strength, realizing that “what will always matter is the woman I am with or without him.” This lovely work of hope and resilience will resonate with women struggling to find their voice and place in the world.

Writer Zaman acknowledges in the beginning of this debut work that memoir is a truth based on what a person feels, and that the art of writing memoir can be difficult. Divided into four acts with simply titled chapters--"Feel," "Forgive," "Pause," "Listen"--the book describes the hardships the author has encountered, including anorexia and an abusive marriage. The volume is mostly organized chronologically, but some chapters travel back and forth through time to give readers an understanding of how past events contributed to Zaman's present circumstances. The strength of the narrative portrays how a person who has contended with enormous tragedy can summon the resolve to confront and rise above it, and courageously share it with others. VERDICT Memoir fans will appreciate Zaman's journey.--Susan E. Montgomery, Rollins Coll., Winter Park, FL

January 1, 2019

Writer Zaman acknowledges in the beginning of this debut work that memoir is a truth based on what a person feels, and that the art of writing memoir can be difficult. Divided into four acts with simply titled chapters--"Feel," "Forgive," "Pause," "Listen"--the book describes the hardships the author has encountered, including anorexia and an abusive marriage. The volume is mostly organized chronologically, but some chapters travel back and forth through time to give readers an understanding of how past events contributed to Zaman's present circumstances. The strength of the narrative portrays how a person who has contended with enormous tragedy can summon the resolve to confront and rise above it, and courageously share it with others. VERDICT Memoir fans will appreciate Zaman's journey.--Susan E. Montgomery, Rollins Coll., Winter Park, FL

December 1, 2018
A Bangladesh-born author, actor, and speaker tells the story of her search for self-acceptance and a life lived across continents.Zaman grew up watching her brilliant, college-educated mother fold in on herself "like an origami bird." Her father, a Zamindar from a politically prominent Bangladeshi family, expressed his love harshly and bullied her mother. He moved the family from Bangladesh to Hawaii and then Thailand in pursuit of his career with the United Nations. From him, the author learned that men dictated what women could and could not do. From a male cousin who went unpunished for trying to molest her, she learned that men could sexually abuse women and not face any consequences. Zaman eventually rebelled by cutting her hair short, becoming anorexic, and sleeping with men of her choosing. She left for college in the United States, studying theater and women's studies, and then went to New York with aspirations to become a stage actor. Meanwhile, her mother, who had procured a career of her own, divorced her father and remarried a man who respected her independence. The author married as well, but her husband was "unkind and often dangerous," just like most of her old lovers. She divorced him and began mending the difficult relationship she had with her father. Cautious of involvements, Zaman fell in love with a self-help guru who believed that an "alpha [male]" should never let a woman "feel too secure in his affections for her." After leaving him, the author went to Oregon to live with her mother and stepfather and "get myself sorted." Within the space of the loving family she never had, the author let go of her inner disciplinarian and began writing to understand--and ultimately release--the self who had been her "imaginary best friend." In this candid book, Zaman not only celebrates her quest to define herself and her voice, but also to find health, self-love, and wholeness.An eloquently searching and intelligent memoir.

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