Can't Think Straight

November 1, 2010

A former Forbes writer drolly details the emotional fallout after her fiancé admitted he was gay.

Not wanting to deceive her any longer, 36-year-old Aaron sat Blakeley down and tearfully admitted he'd been questioning his sexuality for the past two years. Initially amused but eventually shell-shocked, the author shifted into reconnaissance mode, wracking her frenzied brain to recall any signs of Aaron's homosexuality that she may have missed. Blakeley grasped the brunt of her ex's emotional and physical duplicity when she found anonymous personal-ad correspondence and gay-porn videos on his personal computer, a discovery which plunged her into "an eerie twilight world populated by those whom life had kicked in the teeth." An attractive, newly single, 36-year-old woman in Manhattan, Blakeley was prone to crying on the shoulder of her gay friend Tyler and to fits of anger, insecurity and frustration. In attempts to recalibrate herself to single life, she hit the clubs, telling herself to enjoy and not overthink innocent, intermittent dalliances with guys like sensual, soft-voiced Rahil, sexy Pakistani Adi and a few ill-suited men from her profile on Match.com—all while stoking an apprehensive friendship with Aaron ("I love him, and I resent him"). The author was smart to steer clear of emotional ties until she met selfish, 30-something banker James, and all bets (and clothes) were off. Throughout the 320 melodramatic days chronicled in this amiable memoir, Blakeley remains a charming, witty narrator, squandering no opportunity to inject hip, biting sarcasm and hilarious insight into her adventures. Still, a bittersweet aftertaste lingers, reminding readers of "the crippling awareness that you could never know anyone...[that] the person you know best could be the person you know least."

A touching, delicious, compulsively readable account of life after love.

(COPYRIGHT (2010) KIRKUS REVIEWS/NIELSEN BUSINESS MEDIA, INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.)

December 1, 2010
Blakeley, a writer for Forbes, was happily living in New York City, engaged to Aaron, the man shed been with for a decade, when he dropped a bomb on her one afternoon: hes pretty sure hes gay. Blakeley is blindsided by Aarons announcement and suddenly finds herself thrust back into the dating world at the age of 36. Demoralized and certain that she isnt ready to jump into another relationship, Blakeley opts for no-strings-attached hook-ups with two men she meets in bars, a charming Indian lothario named Rahil and James, a younger man whose outward shyness masks his inner player. While Rahil pines for his ex-girlfriend, and James dates a series of younger foreign women, Blakeley tries to navigate a tricky minefield: sex without love. Blakeleys lively memoir definitely limns the emotional upheaval that comes with the dissolution of a long-term relationship, and many will relate to her attempts to get back on her feet and find her way in the often emotionally taxing dating world.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2010, American Library Association.)