Tragedy Plus Time

March 26, 2018
Self-mockery and true pathos make for a powerful mixture in this nuanced memoir about a comedian’s alternately blessed and crushingly tragic family history. At first, it seems like there’s little about Cayton-Holland’s life that would evoke sympathy: raised in Denver by a pair of idealistic parents, the author and his two sisters (whom he refers to as the “Magnificent Cayton-Hollands”) come off as a family that makes others envious, overflowing as they are with well-nurtured talent and densely layered inside jokes. Cayton-Holland is a costar and cocreator of the sitcom Those Who Can’t, and the book opens with a scene of his L.A. showbiz success that feels almost scripted. But while he and one of his sisters found professional success (the sister is a lawyer), their younger sister Lydia struggled with mental illness. Visiting home after a work trip to Montreal, Cayton-Holland checked on Lydia; when she didn’t answer her phone the next morning, he drove to her house and discovered that she had killed herself. Cayton-Holland’s wry and wiry voice here elegantly transitions from half-cynical stand-up pose to thoughtful interpretation of the contradictions of grief (“I like to remember her constantly; I try not to think of her at all”) without losing a beat. This is a vivid and heartbreaking account of two bright lives, one blessed with hard-fought success and one cut painfully short. Agent: Yishai Seidman, Dunow, Carlson & Lerner Literary.

May 15, 2018
A Denver-based comic's account of losing his younger sister to suicide and learning to cope with her death.Cayton-Holland, who created and stars in the sitcom Those Who Can't, grew up in a family under the guidance of "flower children" parents, who raised him and his two sisters "to rage against the injustices of the world." But exposure to the suffering of others, combined with his own natural hypersensitivity, caused the author to seek ways of "circumventing the hurt and upset." As a child, he developed personal rituals--he was later diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder--to make sure "life as I knew it didn't collapse." As he got older, Cayton-Holland discovered that comedy also helped him feel better about the world and himself. The childhood bits he performed in front of his parents, schoolmates, and, later, audiences at Denver's premier comedy clubs eventually led to a career as a respected stand-up comic. But his brilliant and beloved younger sister Lydia, who shared both her brother's hypersensitivity and quirky sense of humor, chose to live a quiet life outside the hustle and bustle of Denver, fostering "dogs and cats and musicians and outcasts." The family gently tried to prod her toward a career, but she refused until finally Cayton-Holland convinced her to return to Denver to help him at his comedy shows. Not long afterward, Lydia had the first of several breakdowns. While she struggled with depression and exasperated family members with her despair, the author's career soared. The reality of just how serious her illness was only registered when Lydia killed herself in 2012. Devastated, Cayton-Holland and his family began a long and painful journey toward emotional healing that forced them to learn difficult lessons in letting go and self-forgiveness. This candid and humane book not only memorializes the life of a beloved sister; it also celebrates the gift of awakened spiritual and emotional sensibilities that loss inevitably leaves in its wake.Both funny and darkly poignant.

COPYRIGHT(2018) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.