I'm the One Who Got Away

September 25, 2017
In this riveting and disturbing memoir, freelance writer Jarrell chronicles living in the shadow of domestic abuse. Jarrell grew up in Los Angeles in the 1970s witnessing her mother’s ongoing abuse at the hands of her father; she and her mother moved out, but to her confusion, her parents reconciled shortly thereafter. Following an intense opening chapter detailing a neighbor’s murder by a boyfriend, Jarrell is forced to reflect into her own story, beginning with her childhood. She does an admirable job of dissecting her family history and the long-lasting emotional wreckage created by domestic abuse. As an adult, she worried about losing the safe life she’d built for herself, and she struggled with anxiety and self-pity. Once Jarrell established a family of her own, she began processing the toll her parent’s violent relationship took on her emotional maturity. While raising her own daughter, Jarrell had a revelation: “Rather than being the child waiting for love and approval, it was time for me to be the mother generously offering such love and understanding to her children even when they rejected her.” Jarrell’s story is simultaneously unassuming and painful to read.