The "Perfect" Parent

August 18, 2014
Parents who are struggling to be the “perfect parent”—and in the process raise the “perfect child”—would do well to take some time out for this unusual guide. Khetarpal’s suggestion for setting your child on the path to future success, which is introduced early in the book, sounds simple: “If a child is happy to begin with, then all the other accomplishments naturally follow.” Any parent knows, however, that raising happy children isn’t all that simple. Using “emotional intelligence” and “personal empowerment,” Khetarpal’s approach is fundamentally different from many currently popular child-rearing approaches. She employs top-shelf experts (Deepak Chopra, Dr. Alvin Rosenfeld, Dr. John Gottman) to illustrate key concepts. She also shares five communication tools to help parents develop a strong and positive relationship with their children. A simple review section at the close of each chapter provides affirmations and quick takeaways that are also collected in a “ ‘Perfect’ Parent Toolbox” at the end of the book and are ideal for easy reference. The book itself isn’t perfect—it includes some cheesy therapist-talk (“dealing with the feeling”) and some concepts (“Honoring your child”) that may turn off some parents. Just as frequently, though, Khetarpal comes up with original and easily applied ideas that may prove lifesavers for the harried parent.

November 15, 2014

Don't be alarmed by this irritating title, which is a spin-off of the author's (encouraging!) belief that your children would choose you over any other possible parent. Begun as a series of parenting classes founded by Khetarpal in 2008 called Tools of Growth, this book takes a calming Deepak Chopra-like view of the journey of child rearing and gives readers a new perspective on the larger themes of why we do what we do. Similar in approach to mindfulness, Khetarpal argues that while we might be around our kids a lot and doing things for them, we are not necessarily connected, and "repetitive questions of doubt and guilt signal us to get off the multitasking highway and slow down." After all, our kids will remember the time we spent with them more than the hours we took rushing them around. VERDICT Complete with affirmation reminders and "quick takeaways" at the end of each chapter, Khetarpal's work has some wise words for finding joy amid the chaos and keeping relationships the primary focus of our daily interactions. Enthusiastically recommended.

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