The Perilous Princess Plot

April 6, 2015
Absurdity reigns in Courtauld’s (On a Pirate Ship) boisterous, logic-warping fantasy, starring sisters Eliza and Lavender, who hail from a “village in the middle of nowhere, which was called the Middle of Nowhere.” While Eliza wants to battle dragons, fairy tale–obsessed Lavender aspires to marry a prince; in one of the book’s many hilarious moments, Courtauld offers scraggly pencil portraits of some of Lavender’s favorite royal dreamboats, including Prince Chlknklkgkfj the Unpronounceable and Prince Kanye the Anachronistic. Lavender’s quest to find her groom triggers a series of madcap incidents involving Mordmont, a villain scheming to kidnap and ransom a princess in order to pay his bills; when Mordmont’s bumbling minions mistake Lavender for a royal and deliver her to him, she in turn mistakes Mordmont for a prince turned beast, à la Beauty and the Beast. In the course of rescuing her sister, Eliza does in fact best a dragon (of sorts), and Lavender finds a prince (of sorts). Abundant wordplay, sarcastic footnotes, and a slew of out-of-left-field jokes make this book ideal for fans of Dav Pilkey, Andy Griffiths, or Lois Lowry’s The Willoughbys. Ages 7–10.

March 1, 2015
Two sisters living in the Middle of Nowhere get involved in a dangerous plot in this debut fantasy from England. Farm girl Lavender completely believes that she will marry a prince, trusting her book of fairy tales implicitly. Practical Eliza tends to the farm and their loyal but enigmatic goat, Gertrude. When Lavender decides to take her fate into her own hands and disguise herself as a princess, she is kidnapped by the minions of the evil Mordmont to hold for ransom. He believes Lavender is the real deal, and Lavender decides he must be the beast who will turn back into a handsome prince when she gives him True Love's First Kiss. Eliza, riding Gertrude, tracks her down and tries to rescue her. However, the girls will have to contend with moat-dragons, especially mother dragon Violet. Courtauld goes wild with puns and humorous turns of phrase: "There was a pause. Then, there were some paws"; in order to escape Lavender's singing, "[b]adgers started hitting each other over the head with rocks in order to make themselves deaf." Most pages sport whimsical pencil drawings by the author, some using more puns, such as a drawing of a tree hung with underpants for "pantry." It's mayhem, with fart jokes, direct addresses to readers, gleefully ridiculous names, and more. Young readers will laugh themselves silly. (Fantasy. 7-10)

March 1, 2015

Gr 3-5-This cross between a fractured fairy tale and any of Roald Dahl's zany adventures is the first installment in the "Buckle and Squash" series. The story centers on two sisters: level-headed Eliza and Lavender, a dreamer. They live with Grandma Maud; their parents died in an accident at a village festival and their Grandpa Joe went missing, both events having taken place before the start of the story. The girls live on a farm in the Middle of Nowhere and while Eliza toils away at their farm chores, Lavender reads fairytales and dreams of princes as she perfects her princess personality. One day, Lavender runs away in hopes of being rescued by a prince and sets off an adventure in which she is captured by a bankrupt bad guy and Eliza must rescue her sister given only a goat named Gertrude for a steed and a hat and a beard as magical tools for saving the day. This humorous tale is funny right down to the sentence level narration ("The next morning was bright and lovely. The birds sang. Dawn rose. Then she went back to bed. Luckily Dawn isn't part of this story. She didn't really get up to much."). Witty writing combined with a cast of characters that are as ridiculous as they are memorable-rendered in black-and-white drawings throughout-makes for a great series opener. VERDICT A fun read for chapter book and younger middle grade readers.-Samantha Lumetta, Public Library of Cincinnati and Hamilton County, OH

Copyright 2015 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

May 15, 2015
Grades 2-4 This mixed-up fairy tale has everything readers could want, including adventure, danger, and a cantankerous goat. Lavender wants to marry a prince, and the easiest way to meet one is to be rescued, so she sets off to put herself in mortal danger. Meanwhile, villain Mordmont decides the only way to solve his money problems is to hold a princess for ransom, and it's not long before Lavender is in his dungeon. When Lavender's sister, Eliza, discovers her missing, she has no choice but to saddle up the family goat and save her sister with nothing but her own cunning. Readers already familiar with common fairy-tale tropes will laugh at the wacky events that ensue. Black-and-white illustrations add to the fun, as does the narration, which gives the reader a behind-the-scenes look and creates several inside jokes. Just right for readers who like their princess stories with a large dose of humor.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2015, American Library Association.)