How to Get a Date Worth Keeping

February 15, 2005
Drawing on more than ten years' experience coaching singles on dating, Cloud attempts to help readers overcome either stale or unfruitful dating. He encourages singles to think about dating not only as a way to find a mate but also as a means to learn, grow, and experience other people. Activities like keeping a journal and reaching a quota of meeting potential dates per week are suggested, as are honest self-reflection and behavior. Cloud also challenges unrealistic fantasies such as waiting for God to provide the perfect person and hoping that the relationship will solve life's problems. Though written from a Christian perspective, this book does not proselytize, and the advice is sound. However, it will be more readily picked up in Christian communities, for which it is recommended.

Copyright 2005 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

January 24, 2005
Geared for the reported 3.5 million evangelical Christian singles in America, this guide by Cloud-author of the bestselling Boundaries series of relationship books-offers sound advice on the dating game. Some of his tenets may take Christian readers by surprise: he asserts, for example, that there's no one Mr. or Ms. Right for each person, and that people should stop waiting around for a dream individual to sweep them off their feet. ("God guides and provides," Cloud states, "but he also requires us to do our part.") He also asserts that dating is not just a precursor to marriage, disagreeing with those Christians who refuse to date unless they glimpse a tiered wedding cake at the end of the rainbow. Non-serious dating, Cloud writes, is an essential step in the process of eventually finding a mate, because it teaches people what they need and want through trial and error. Cloud unveils a whole program for "getting out there" in the dating world: singles should keep a log of all the eligible people they meet; go places where other singles go (Cloud calls this "changing your traffic pattern"); consider joining a dating service; and forget the "love at first sight" myth. He even suggests dating non-Christians-which will raise some evangelical eyebrows-while repeating his proviso that dating is not marriage. Most of the book's examples are of women seeking men, but all Christian singles can benefit from this practical, down-to-earth manual.