Choosing ME before WE

January 19, 2009
Overachieving woman or underexperienced dater, there's a Valentine's Day advice book for you.
Choosing Me Before We: Every Woman's Guide to Life and Love
Christine Arylo
. New World Library
(PGW, dist.), $14.95 paper (240p) ISBN 978-1-57731-641-1

Author and life coach Arylo's own life story informs every page of this insightful book. After a 15-year relationship, her fiancé called it quits two hours before the engagement party, causing Arylo, a successful marketing executive, months of devastation and self-doubt. This three-part guide about co-dependent relationships, settling for the wrong man and not knowing what you want begins with “Me,” showing how crucial it is to get to know yourself first because “our relationships are mirrors of ourselves.” Arylo delves a little deeper than most by being honest about how many women are in denial about relationships being fueled by the fear of being alone and feeling incomplete. In part two (“He”), the author guides the reader through a series of visualizations to identify four core qualities the reader wants in her future mate, and part three (“We”) advises on maintaining authenticity and intimacy in a relationship. This exercise in intention-setting and manifestation will help any woman who wants a lasting partnership that reflects her own true self.