When You Love a Man Who Loves Himself

February 14, 2005
"Every time I talked about narcissists' romantic relationships," writes Campbell, who has studied the subject for years, "women would seem to pay particular attention...They would at first get a puzzled look in their eyes, then start nodding, and finally have an 'ahha' experience." Yes, women know about narcissistic men: those goodlooking, extroverted, selfconfident and, ultimately, uncaring and unfaithful men who seemed at first to be so exciting. Campbell, a young academic who wrote his doctoral dissertation on narcissists and romance, offers a book that's a couple of notches above the usual relationship advice bookintelligent, sober and well written. He clearly defines narcissism and how it is different from simple high selfesteem (narcissists need to be the best, and have a strong sense of entitlement); then offers a "narcissist'seyeview" of a romantic relationship so readers can identify their traits (the narcissist see his girlfriend as a trophy whose purpose is to make him look good; he needs to be in control of the relationship); the difficulty of getting a narcissist to abandon his narcissism; and personal and social reasons why women date narcissists. Campbell has a wide rangehe can draw on popular films as well as psychological research. If your man seems to love himself too much and you not enough, this is a good place to seek understanding and advice.

February 7, 2005
"Every time I talked about narcissists' romantic relationships," writes Campbell, who has studied the subject for years, "women would seem to pay particular attention...They would at first get a puzzled look in their eyes, then start nodding, and finally have an 'ahha' experience." Yes, women know about narcissistic men: those goodlooking, extroverted, selfconfident and, ultimately, uncaring and unfaithful men who seemed at first to be so exciting. Campbell, a young academic who wrote his doctoral dissertation on narcissists and romance, offers a book that's a couple of notches above the usual relationship advice bookintelligent, sober and well written. He clearly defines narcissism and how it is different from simple high selfesteem (narcissists need to be the best, and have a strong sense of entitlement); then offers a "narcissist'seyeview" of a romantic relationship so readers can identify their traits (the narcissist see his girlfriend as a trophy whose purpose is to make him look good; he needs to be in control of the relationship); the difficulty of getting a narcissist to abandon his narcissism; and personal and social reasons why women date narcissists. Campbell has a wide rangehe can draw on popular films as well as psychological research. If your man seems to love himself too much and you not enough, this is a good place to seek understanding and advice.

Copyright 2005 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.