Me & Mr. Cigar

Starred review from December 1, 2019
With federal agents in hot pursuit, two Texas teens and a small dog with unusual abilities roar off to New York in a battered pickup. Haynes, lead singer of the Butthole Surfers, crafts a gloriously unhinged road trip from a host of promising elements. Five years after meeting Mr. Cigar--a loyal, frighteningly smart, and possibly immortal escapee (it turns out) from a secret government project--Oscar is living the dream, organizing local roadside raves. The idyll comes to an abrupt end, though, as a series of ominous encounters with corrupt cop Cletus Acox and scarred military man Colonel Sanders, coupled with a plea for cash from his desperate older sister, send Oscar, with his canine sidekick and his best buddy Lytle, haring off cross-country. Unfortunately, in the meantime Oscar has unwittingly quaffed a Red Bull doctored with both MDMA and LSD--which adds, to say the least, a hallucinatory quality to a narrative already propelled by staccato minichapters, profane banter, surreal events highlighted by a bank robbery in the buff, a climactic battle with goons both visible and otherwise, and more than one fatality that turns out to be only temporary. Oscar is wreathed by a colorful supporting cast led by a pooch who is generally the brightest and most dangerous character in the room. Lytle, who is black, is the only character who doesn't present as white. As boy-and-his-dog tales go, a long, long way from Lassie. (Satiric fantasy. 14-adult)

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December 23, 2019
This drug-fueled escapade from Butthole Surfers frontman Haynes follows 17-year-old Oscar Lester as he travels from Texas to New York City with Mr. Cigar, his “clairvoyant immortal dog,” and Lytle Taylor, his black best friend and business partner. The trip serves two purposes: eluding the dogged Colonel Sanders, who claims that Mr. Cigar is government property, and rescuing Oscar’s 22-year-old sister Rachel, who calls from her SoHo apartment in desperate need of $35,000. Mr. Cigar, taken in by Oscar five years ago, molted a camouflaging creature that severed Rachel’s hand, and aids Oscar in his “assorted nefarious activities”—in one scene, the terrier helpfully carries “five thousand dollars’ worth of MDMA” in his mouth. Though lightly sketched, the cast includes intriguing characters, such as Oscar’s friend and mentor Carla Marks, who uses her interspecies communication skills to invent scientific marvels. One such invention, an aerosol spray that covers surfaces in a camouflaging video film, proves useful when the boys’ repeated failures to source Rachel’s ransom result in a nude bank robbery. While the narrative often feels disjointed and absurd for absurdity’s sake, Haynes’s fast-paced debut is full of colorful characters and concepts. Ages 14–up.

January 1, 2020

Gr 9 Up-In this debut novel from the lead singer of the band Butthole Surfers, Oscar's best friend is his dog Mr. Cigar. When Oscar is 12, the pair run afoul of his sister's boyfriend, Larry, who kicks Mr. Cigar to his death at the bottom of a bridge. Mr. Cigar resurrects and spawns a bat-like creature that can camouflage with its surroundings. After attacking Oscar's sister Rachel and biting off her hand, the bat creature flies off, never to be seen again. Years later, Oscar is late in his teenage years and has become well known for throwing massive raves at his late father's tech company. He's also something of an amateur drug dealer and Mr. Cigar is still his constant companion. Eventually, a rogue government contractor recognizes Mr. Cigar and wants him back. That, coupled with cryptic phone calls from his sister Rachel in New York, convince Oscar to pack up Mr. Cigar and his human friend Lytle to embark on an impromptu road trip. Can he get away from the evil Colonel Sanders and save his sister in time? The author draws upon his own modest suburban upbringing in Texas in crafting the character of Oscar and his surroundings. The end result is unique, but also highly scattered. The narrative loses focus several times, in particular in a chapter where Oscar is slipped an acid tab by DJ Mike. Teens will no doubt appreciate the way that Oscar and Lytle talk to one another, as their organic dialogue repeatedly reflects modern adolescent immaturity and amazement. Some moments, as when Oscar and Lytle arrive in New York, buy their bikes, and explore Central Park, are a delight to read. VERDICT This strange novel is a supplemental purchase for YA collections.-Ryan P. Donovan, Southborough Public Library, MA

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