Why Mars & Venus Collide

Author John Gray reads this book in a clear tenor voice. His straightforward, serviceable style makes the accessible material even simpler to grasp. His subject is the communication difficulties experienced by men and women who, being from different planets, have different reactions to the stress caused by today's increasingly complex world. This inherent difference in men's and women's coping strategies leads directly to conflict and, thus, more stress. Much of Gray's book is devoted to pinpointing how male testosterone (governing their fight-or-flight, project-oriented natures) and female oxytocin (producing their nurturing, talk-loving tendencies) are at the heart of these differences, and to scripted ways to solve the resulting problems. This makes for sometimes simplistic, though often interesting, listening. J.C.G. (c) AudioFile 2008, Portland, Maine

December 3, 2007
The author of the wildly successful Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
now posits that men (Mars) and women (Venus) naturally react differently to everyday stress, which in turn causes more stress in their relationships. When Gray says “naturally,” he means hormones. When a man, after a stressful day, wants to veg out in front of the TV, he is not rejecting his wife. Rather, he is replenishing his depleted testosterone. And when a woman wants to talk about her day, she is not being a nag. It's just her way of replenishing her cuddle hormone, oxytocin. According to Gray, the fact that women have more body fat means they burn more energy than men, which makes their minds create endless to-do lists. Gray does not consider cultural differences figuring in the stress mix. If anything, Gray seems to come down hard—or focus more—on women, perhaps because women are his most likely audience. Thus, he discusses “Why Women Never Forget a Quarrel”; and “Making a Man Happier Is Easier than You Think” (in which he uses a devoted dog as an example). It's simplistic but easy to digest and no doubt headed for the bestseller lists.

April 7, 2008
Gray reads his take on why men and women are growing incapable of managing their relationships because of our work-oriented society. While not exactly as groundbreaking as it labels itself, Gray's insights are truthful and easy to understand. His reading is straightforward and slightly bland, but the lessons he preaches are the real stars. Gray offers simple insights for both sexes, useful even if you aren't involved in a relationship. However, this book lacks profound lessons or discoveries, and listeners searching for that tidbit of information that will save their relationship may be disappointed. Gray's reading also is somewhat disengaged from the material, which makes listening to him a chore at times. Simultaneous release with the Harper hardcover (Reviews, Dec. 13, 2007).

Copyright 2008 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.