How to Raise Your Adult Children

May 17, 2010
Comedy writer Parent and psychotherapist Ende combine their wit and expertise in this collection of letters from parents facing issues with grown children. According to the U.S. Census, 55% of men and 48% of women ages 18 to 24 are living with their parents: this trend has given rise to a host of financial and lifestyle conflicts. In separate chapters, each with an introductory section, the authors answer questions relating to money, the college years, living arrangements, work, dating, family rituals, marriage, in-laws, grandchildren, divorce, and aging and illness. In their approaches, the authors differ: Parent, who wrote for The Golden Girls, is often tongue-in-cheek, while Ende takes a slightly more earnest approach. The questions—gathered from friends, relatives, and "strangers"— are wide-ranging, from what to do when a college student trades the car his parents bought him for a motorcycle to how to deal with a dad who is dating his daughter’s 28-year-old girlfriend. The dueling tones and format don’t always work, but the authors’ overriding theme—that adult children are separate from parents, who must respect their right to make their own choices in order to foster independence—rings true.