When Someone You Love Is Angry

January 1, 2002
A simple 7-step program to deal with an emotionally or physically abusive loved one (spouse, parent, sibling or child) seems too easy to be effective. But Gentry is not a lightweight pop author; he is editor in chief of the Journal of Behavioral Medicine, and has been working with victims of what he calls"toxic" anger ("anger that is experienced far too often, is far too intense and lasts far too long") for decades. Believable case studies illustrate how Gentry's seven steps can work, and he accepts the irrationality of the love that makes people reluctant to leave such relationships (though if the other steps fail, he advises, it may be necessary to leave). Questionnaires and tables help readers evaluate their situation and answer such questions as"how angry is too angry?" He then offers sensible, tested steps, not to change the angry person, but to manage the anger and one's response to it, such as getting a support network and controlling one's own anger. Anyone in a toxic anger situation will benefit from Gentry's calm, wise advice.

August 23, 2004
A simple 7-step program to deal with an emotionally or physically abusive loved one (spouse, parent, sibling or child) seems too easy to be effective. But Gentry is not a lightweight pop author; he is editor in chief of the Journal of Behavioral Medicine, and has been working with victims of what he calls"toxic" anger ("anger that is experienced far too often, is far too intense and lasts far too long") for decades. Believable case studies illustrate how Gentry's seven steps can work, and he accepts the irrationality of the love that makes people reluctant to leave such relationships (though if the other steps fail, he advises, it may be necessary to leave). Questionnaires and tables help readers evaluate their situation and answer such questions as"how angry is too angry?" He then offers sensible, tested steps, not to change the angry person, but to manage the anger and one's response to it, such as getting a support network and controlling one's own anger. Anyone in a toxic anger situation will benefit from Gentry's calm, wise advice.

Copyright 2004 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.