I Was Here

Starred review from October 20, 2014
As she did in If I Stay, Forman offers an introspective examination of the line between life and death, and the courage it takes to persist. College freshman Meg’s suicide shocks no one more than her best friend Cody. To make Meg’s death even more unsettling, the last six months of her emails are missing from her computer. Certain that an outsider—a correspondent of Meg’s—pushed her to take her own life, Cody embarks on a quest to identify the culprit. Her journey proves both enlightening and dangerous as she traces the steps Meg took during her last weeks of life. As the pieces of a disturbing puzzle start to fit together, Cody takes an enormous risk to come to terms with Meg’s final decision and her own guilt. Beyond exploring Cody’s grief, this psychologically incisive book delves into her complex relationships with Tricia, her single mother; Meg’s more conventional family; and, most profoundly, the boy who stole and wounded Meg’s heart shortly before her death. Ages 14–up. Agent: Michael Bourret, Dystel & Goderich Literary Management.

October 15, 2014
Part tautly paced mystery, part psychological study of suicide and its aftereffects. When Cody's best friend, Meg, kills herself by downing cleaning fluid in a motel room, she tidily leaves behind a tip for the maid and time-delayed emails for Cody, her parents and the police. Cody's devastated: After all, she and Meg were inseparable since kindergarten. That is, they were close until talented Meg escaped their dead-end town to attend college on a fellowship while Cody stayed behind. But when Cody travels to Meg's college town to pack up what's left of Meg's life, she's startled by how much doesn't make sense: Why would someone so full of promise and life choose death? How much did Meg's housemates know about her fateful decision? And why does Meg have an encrypted file on her computer? Seeking to justify the picture of the friend she thought she knew with the one she's piecing together, Cody faces questions about their friendship, along with a growing attraction for Ben, the boy she believes broke Meg's heart. Forman's characters are all too human: Cody's willingness to ignore what doesn't fit her picture of Meg as she struggles to come to terms with her sadness and guilt rings true of those left behind to face the tragedy of suicide. An engrossing and provocative look at the devastating finality of suicide, survivor's guilt, the complicated nature of responsibility and even the role of the Internet in life-and-death decisions. (Fiction. 14 & up)

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November 1, 2014

Gr 9 Up-Cody and Meg have been inseparable since childhood. They planned to leave their small town in Washington and move to Seattle to go to college, but that changed when Meg got a full scholarship to a small, prestigious private college in Tacoma, WA. Having no scholarships or money saved, Cody is now stuck in town, cleaning houses to have a little bit of money to give to her mom toward living expenses and to take a couple classes at the local community college. Those classes have gone by the wayside, though, since news came of Meg's suicide. Meticulously planned, her former best friend ordered a poison that had a high fatality rate, and sent emails to friends and family on a timed delay so that no one could interfere with her fatal decision. Cody struggles to figure out why Meg took her own life and puzzles over a suspicious line in her friend's suicide email. The distraught but determined teen begins to encrypt files on Meg's laptop, which lead her to a suicide support group and posts from All_BS, a Pied Piper-type character who encourages suicide as a way out. As she goes further down the rabbit hole, Cody comes to the realization that she needs to forgive Meg, and, more importantly, herself. Reminiscent of Nina LaCour's Hold Still (Dutton, 2009), Anna Jarzab's All Unquiet Things (Delacorte, 2010), and Jay Asher's Thirteen Reasons Why (Penguin, 2007), teens will clamor for this latest offering from the author of If I Stay (Dutton, 2009). Have multiple copies in your collection.-Suanne B. Roush, formerly at Osceola High School, Seminole, FL

Copyright 2014 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

October 15, 2014
Grades 9-12 Eighteen-year-old Cody's best friend, Meg, has committed suicide, and Cody is determined to discover why and how it could be that she didn't sense what Meg was contemplating. As she begins her investigation, she meets a young musician, Ben, with whom Meg was obsessed but who rejected her. How responsible might he have been for Meg's death? How will Cody deal with his growing presence in her own life? And what is the meaning of the strange, encrypted message she discovers on Meg's computer? At first Cody finds more questions than answers, but she is dogged in her pursuit of knowledge and gradually comes ever closer to the startling truth. Suicide has always been a subject in YA literature, and to her credit, Forman handles it sensitively and gracefully, raising important issues of the ethics and morality of the subject. The combination mystery and love story is sure to reach a wide readership and excite essential discussion. HIGH-DEMAND BACKSTORY: With the big-budget film adaptation of Forman's best-seller If I Stay (2009) still lingering in theaters, this latest offering should generate massive teen interest.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2014, American Library Association.)