The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers

February 21, 2011
Arguing that many moms have gone overboard in their quest for perfection, the Michigan-based pediatrician and mother of four presents 10 "new habits" that will help moms maintain their passion, purpose, and sanity. In separate chapters, Meeker addresses understanding your value as a mother, maintaining key friendships, valuing and practicing faith, saying no to competition, creating a healthier relationship with money, making time for solitude, giving and getting love in healthy ways, finding ways to live simply, letting go of fear, and embracing hope. Meeker urges mothers to dig deep to find their life's purpose, rejecting cute but superficial one-liners such as "I'm here to drive my kids around." Though she claims to be "a scientist at heart," Meeker, a Christian, waxes philosophical on many issues, including the importance of faith and spirituality. She also urges moms to seek solitude and live more simply while rejecting such "toxic" cultural messages as being thinner, looking hot, and making more money. Readers in search of tips on how to help their kids excel won't find them here; this is a sincere and thoughtful discussion of what really matters in a mother's life.

December 15, 2010

Pediatrician and mother Meeker (Boys Should Be Boys: 7 Secrets to Raising Healthy Sons, 2008, etc.) addresses the stress of modern motherhood.

Instead of recognizing that their supreme value lies in simply being good mothers and fulfilling their children's needs, women are oppressed by unreasonable social expectations that they satisfy high performance standards for their roles as caregivers, breadwinners and companions. Meeker's values are based on her Christian faith, and the book is organized around 10 habits that can help shield mothers from the stress of contemporary parenthood. These include understanding one's value as a mother, cherishing friendship, having faith, saying no to competition with other parents, not over-valuing money to the detriment of family life, practicing a simplified lifestyle, setting aside personal time, letting go of fears and making the decision to be hopeful even when we cannot control events. The author effectively uses anecdotes to illustrate and elaborate her points. Some are told humorously, such as her account of initial shock at her mother-in-law's Christmas gift of two cemetery plots next to her own. Others are painful—e.g., one mother's struggle with her daughter's life-threatening anorexia; another's need to confront her son's rebellious behavior and overcome her own fears of rejection.

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