Cuffed, Tied, and Satisfied

June 23, 2014
Somatic sexologist Jaiya presents a beginner's guide to kink, particularly "the realms of power dynamics" in BDSM. She begins with a psychology lesson on the nature of vulnerability, the catharsis that draws many to submission, and the natural endorphins released when dominating. To help readers find their "erotic wiring" and better understand their sexual needs, she provides a checklist of activities to fill out with a partner. For the dominant, Jaiya provides useful tips on establishing demeanor, creating parameters for a session and instructions for games. Submissives receive a lesson on "subspace," a trance-like state of "total ecstasy." She details a vast number of specific exercises and scenarios, from breath play to spanking to using restraints. Each action is broken down into steps with a list of required accessories and a safety rating. Safety, both physical and psychological, is discussed at length and Jaiya encourages the ready use of safe words and maps out the body's "no-impact" and "no-bind" zones. Through interspersed journal entries, she also shares her own experiences with her partner. Jaiya's friendly and accessible introduction to kink is perfect for those seeking to spice up their sex life, though more experienced readers may find it rudimentary.