A Buddhist Grief Observed

June 13, 2016
Newland, chair of the department of philosophy and religion at Central Michigan University and a scholar of Tibetan Buddhism, forgoes academic language and instead uses C.S. Lewis’s A Grief Observed as a guidepost for Buddhist reflections on bereavement. He is candid and heartbreakingly honest when revealing the emotional trauma he endured after the death of his wife. While in the throes of grief, Newland looked to Buddhist teachings on karma, impermanence, emptiness, and the lived experience to make sense of his wife’s death. He dispenses with some interpretations of Buddhism (such as the karmic belief that his wife’s suffering was caused by her own actions) but makes deep use of Buddhist considerations surrounding grief: deep accepting of the lived experience; turning to others as mutually, mortally wounded individuals; honoring the deceased by being kind to oneself through the experience. The simplicity and poetry of Newland’s prose is deceptive, and his observations suggest immense depths of wisdom underneath the heartache: “To be human is to set sail for the next shipwreck.” He offers a powerful and moving eulogy to his wife, and tender, compassionate support for those experiencing the loss of a loved one.